From China with (Anything but) Love

Mad China

Dear Western World,

After much thinking and thinking we have decided to write a letter to western world. This because no matter what we do, no matter what we say western world is not treating China well.
Our Chinese blood boiling at all insults flinging on our land. We have plenty money. We have $2 trillion reserves still stupid America not taking heed and supporting western world in daily insulting Chinese honour.
Look at this Google company. One day they say we pulling out of China. Ha ! We have 1.3 billion Chinese people in china … does Google want to pull out of such huge marketing opportunity? Then why this nonsense. And daily they create some hullaballoo when we block some website. They say China blocking website. Website not working. In India everyday websites crashing, not working but no one create hullabaloo.
When U.S. building plenty big missile no one saying anything. When China building missiles everyone anxious. Why like this?
And now things too much . You giving Nobel Peace prize to criminal Liu Xiaobo. We ask you how he peaceful?
He only peaceful because he in jail. If we not put him in jail he inciting riots and treasoning all over place. And who put him in jail. China. So give Peace prize to China.
Then giving thought to Tiwan. Stupid Taiwanese people wanting freedom. Not wanting to be part of China. Morons. And bigger moron world media saying china doing human right violation. We feel like taking media into room and violating them now. Here media very good. They say what we say they say. No nonsense.
And journalists big culprit. Everyday creating useless controversy about China. China big bully .. China big country. All nonsense.
And top of all western world giving 2010 Courage in Journalism” award to Tsering Woeser.
Stupid female. We banning her books. She go blogging. We ban her blog. She go radioing. What irritating lady. And u give her courage award. We ask who make her full of courage. If we not banning book and not banning blog how she getting courage award then?
So world stop messing with China.. already plenty mess here. Daily population increasing, no rice no chopstick. Like Americans say “Cut Crap now.”
Give us Nobel prize and Courage journalist award. And watch your reporters.
If we become mad then world in Big trouble.

The peoples Republic of China

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6 Comments

  1. Obaid Ahmed
    Posted October 25, 2010 at 3:40 pm | Permalink | Reply

    loved this article. very well written.
    –> you no mess with china <–
    Hilarious,

    • saqib ahmed
      Posted October 25, 2010 at 8:26 pm | Permalink | Reply

      Heh!Thanks! Glad that you liked it. Though I don’t know about the “well written” part… I thought it was “velly badly litten” !
      Cheers.

  2. Ashish
    Posted November 4, 2010 at 12:52 pm | Permalink | Reply

    Haha too good. M a fan now 🙂

    • saqib ahmed
      Posted November 4, 2010 at 9:08 pm | Permalink | Reply

      And I am honoured, Thanks for reading! 🙂

  3. Posted November 16, 2010 at 3:04 pm | Permalink | Reply

    This is hilarious!! I couldn’t stop laughing… thanks for sharing! 🙂

    • saqib ahmed
      Posted November 20, 2010 at 11:40 am | Permalink | Reply

      thanks. am glad u liked it!

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